Dr Love’s top 5 tips for couples at St Valentine’s Day

With LURVE well and truly in the air this week at Clothes-Make-the-Man this week we caught up with relationship expert, psychologist and therapist, Dr. Kalanit Ben-Ari, who has recently launched her 30 day online course ‘Ready for Love’ specifically for couples. The course condenses Dr. Kalanit’s 16 years of experience into one, easy to follow programme featuring her tips, secrets and practical advice.

With over 15 years’ experience, Dr. Kalanit has built a solid reputation for providing a first-class service at her private clinic in Hampstead, London. As a wife and mother of two, her passion and dedication to help couples prosper in their relationship and for families to work together as a strong unit is second to none. Dr. Kalanit has also published two books, ‘Small Steps to Great Parenting – The Essential Guide for Busy Families’, which provides cutting edge information on parenting and reached Amazon Best seller, and ‘The Lost Book’, which is written for those aged four to eight and demonstrates to children and parents alike how frustration can be turned into a creative and positive experience.

For couples who simply want to spice up their relationship, learn new things about themselves, their partner or their partnership. For couples searching for tools and direction to transform challenges into meaningful and happy relationships – Ready For Love is specifically designed to help couples get the relationship they desire.

Dr. Kalanit’s proven programme can help shift old habits, unlock the relationship’s true potential, and help couples to fall in love all over again. Designed with today’s busy lifestyle in mind, all of the content is concise but fun. Today, she has shared her top five tips for couples to make the most of Valentine’s Day and help strengthen their relationship long-term.

1) Think outside the box: plan a ‘novelty’ experience. In a long term relationship, you’ve probably exhausted the dinner and a movie date option. Think about a time when you were more adventurous and look for high energy, fun activities that create an exciting shift in energy. This is ideal if you’re active people, but even if you’re not – the bonding hormones can kick in with a joint activity. For the adventurous ones, research shows that when we feel fear and excitement we often fancy the person we do it with!

2) Think from your partner’s point of view: we often give to others what we would like to receive ourselves, but the key to a meaningful gift is to plan something you know your partner will really appreciate. And if you’re not sure, it’s ok to ask the other person before assuming (in a subtle way of course). Opening up these kinds of conversations can bring you much closer together. You might be more sociable than your partner who prefers something more intimate. You may want to go away as a couple for the weekend, but your partner would prefer a physical gift to open.

3) Commit to growth and development: if things aren’t going smoothly in your relationship, use Valentine’s Day as an opportunity for growth and development, rather than a symbolic one-off event. There are some great relationship workshops out there that can be a game-changers for couples who aren’t sure where to start. For instance, the Imago educational weekend for couples, or my ‘Ready For Love’ online courses for couples at all different stages. There are also a number of books with exercises you can do by yourself, such as ‘Getting The Love You Want’ by Harville Hendrix and Hellen Lukkely-Hunt, or ‘Hot Monogamy’ by Pat Love. Committing yourself to a process that will rejuvenate your relationship – you might just fall in love with your partner all over again.

4) Look for a gift with meaning: think about your relationship and ask yourself if there are any pieces missing. Use what you come up with to guide you in the direction of a gift with meaning. For instance, if you feel that you take each other for granted, make a list of all the things you love and appreciate about your partner, and be passionate about it. Include all aspects of your life: career, finance, physicality, intimacy, parenthood, social life and so on. On the morning of Valentine’s Day, share the list with them, and you can both start the day feeling positive and full of love and appreciation.

5)  Fun, fun, fun! In my experience as a couples therapist, I can tell you one thing for sure; in long-term relationship, couples rarely have the right balance between shared responsibilities and fun/romance. Having fun not only serves you by creating a ground on which to flourish and overcome challenging times, but it is the essence of who we are. The joyfulness of relationships can be dulled by daily stress and responsibilities, we think we don’t have time for fun. It’s not about finding the time however, it’s about being mindful and prioritising, and you can find opportunities for this throughout every day. Something as small as welcoming your partner home at the end of the day with a level of over-excitement, as if you hadn’t seen them for a week, can help bring back the feeling of excitement and lust you felt at the start of the relationship.

A new BIG trend in Grooming – R&R Luxury

Over the last decade we’re seen LOTS of trends dominate the Beauty, but the grooming world as well, with many of these, maybe not surprisingly coming from Japan and some specifically, Korea. However, as the decade changes, get ready for the twenties and A-Beauty. Yes, Africa is where the latest upscale, ethical innovations in beauty and grooming are coming from. Think of incredibly recherché brands such as African Botanics (as sold on Net-a-Porter), which harvest the continent’s natural riches and also ethical stars like the social enterprise initiative Organic Savanna.

Now leading this hot trend is R&R Luxury, a beautifully clean and ethical skincare collection created by Ghanaian entrepreneur Valerie Obaze. The sustainable collection is powered by 100% natural Shea Butter Oil, an indigenous African wonder ingredient that has been employed in natural remedies for centuries. This magical ingredient used by R&R Luxury products is proudly farmed in Ghana by a dedicated women’s co-operative which alleviates rural poverty and creates long-term employment opportunities for rural women and young people.

R&R Luxury products are packed with indulgent, ultra-hydrating ingredients that are incredibly gentle on the skin, drenching it in all of nature’s riches. The brand is also vegan and clean, containing no chemical nasties such as SLS, and all formulas are packaged in recyclable plastic so the impact on the planet is minimal as well.

Some of our favourite products within the range are the Men’s Liquid Black Soap. Made with shea butter and delicately scented with lemongrass, this enriching soap is 100% natural and sourced from Ghana – the home of shea.

Use it at night to cleanse and protect or in the morning to refresh and all it’s range is Vegan friendly. Or it’s Men’s Shea Oil – Lemongrass

Delicately scented with lemongrass, this smooth shea oil is 100% natural and sourced from Ghana – the home of Shea. Its natural healing properties make it the perfect solution for stressed skin and dry hair.

Apply at night to invigorate and protect, or in the morning to energise and revive.

Plus, the Men’s  Shea Oil – Marrakech Nights. This delicately scented with an eastern-inspiredfragrance oil, this shea oil is 100% natural and sourced from Ghana – the home of Shea. Its natural healing proper- ties make it the perfect solution for stressed skin and dry hair. Apply at night to promote a peaceful sleep, or in the morning to awaken the senses.

5 Party Hosting Tips for Introvert Men

Words by Peter Minkoff

Being young and throwing parties all the time might seem like the perfect way to pass your time and feel alive. After all, this is how you can meet other people, do something exciting with your life, and realize all your true potentials. However, if you’re an introvert person, you might be able to do all these things. Introverts have a problem interacting with people around them, and they usually need some time to adapt to their surroundings, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be social and friendly. So, if you’re an introvert man yourself, you might easily prefer hosting a party yourself and spend time at your own home instead of going to a bar. If you need some help doing that, here are five tips that might make your parties even more successful.

Choose the right outfit

This is probably the most important thing for all party goers, no matter how introvert they are. It’s the same for men and women, and it’s definitely true that picking the right party outfit might help you more than you can realize. This is especially the case if you’re dealing with some sort of a problem, like all introvert men are, so finding the appropriate clothes might be the perfect first step when getting ready to party.

But, even this essential step might not be as easy as you’d thought it would. Finding the right pants, the right shirt, the right shoes, and the right accessories could take quite a lot of time, especially if you’re trying to make a great first impression. That’s why you should stick to pieces that are simple yet elegant, such as an amazing velvet jacket or a cool new watch, and minimize your stress completely.

Find the right drink

Once you’ve picked your outfit, it’s time to get the party started, and there’s no better way to do so than to find the drink that will make you relaxed and help you feel cool. There are lots of ideas you can try out, depending on your taste and preferences, and the chances are your favorite drink will always do the trick. This particular process of calming you down might take a while, but it’s sometimes the only thing that might help an introvert feel great at a party.

When it comes to choosing the correct drink that will suit you and do you good, this process is even trickier. It has a lot to do with how you’re feeling at the moment and how eager you are to join the party, but also with what you love drinking generally. Some introvert men opt for simple things like beer and wine, while others pick stronger stuff, such as whiskey, vodka, or a popular cocktail. Just stick to the things that make you good, and you won’t make a mistake.

Get some help

Throwing a party on your own might not sound like the hardest thing in the world, but if you’re trying to do everything right, it definitely isn’t as easy as you may think. There’s a lot of planning and a bunch of details you have to take into consideration, and this requires a ton of time, patience, and energy.

Due to that, you might consider getting some help – leaving a few things to the professionals could help you quite a lot and turn your party from average to extraordinary. From decorators to musicians, these people will help you prepare and plan your party in a cool and exciting way, and that’s something we all need. You should also consult an expert in mixology who could help you explore various cocktails because this is something all your guests are going to love!

Invite the right people

If you’re an introvert, you might not be the most outgoing person in the world, which is why hanging out with a selected group of friends is probably the only way you could party. When it comes to throwing parties, this means you can’t invite a massive group of people who will make you feel awkward and uncomfortable – on the contrary, you should keep things simple and stick to just a handful of people.

Not only should you invite the people you know and who you hang out with on a regular basis, but these people also need to be aware of the fact that you’re an introvert. In case they don’t know that, they might not understand the concept of your party and why it’s so low-key.

Make sure you’re happy

In the end, this is the only thing that matters – being happy is something we all need, whether we’re men or women, introvert or not. If you too want to throw a party that’s going to make you feel good and give you a chance to hang out with the people who you love, being an introvert shouldn’t stop you.

Of course, this isn’t the only way to feel happy – other amazing ways include getting enough sleep, traveling the world, being in the open, and finding a piece of mind, among other things – but it’s a great way to do so. So, just invite a couple of friends over, prepare some food, spend as much time with them as you can, and you’re surely going to have an amazing time.

Throwing a party when you’re an introvert doesn’t have to be an impossible mission. On the contrary, just follow these five tips, and you’ll have the time of your life!

SIX MEN’S GROOMING HACKS TO HIDE YOUR HANGOVER

Words by Brad Wicks

From moisturising your dehydrated skin to scrubbing away last night’s wild antics, here are six men’s grooming tips to tackle your dreaded hangover from leading men’s grooming brand The Bluebeards Revenge.

Woken up to a forgotten alarm with burning eyes, a sweaty body and a mop that is out of control? You’re most probably hungover and need to do something about it, pronto! But fear not, as men’s grooming brand The Bluebeards Revenge has all the answers to your hangover woes…

SCRUB AWAY YOUR HANGOVER

Scrubbing away the remnants of a night out is a great feeling; made even better with The Bluebeards Revenge Face Scrub. With a unique formulation of finely crushed olive stones, the brand’s best-selling exfoliator promises to rehydrate even the thirstiest skin. Add to that a dash of ginger root extract and you’ve got yourself an antiseptic that smells as good as it looks. All in, this powerful concoction will leave your tired skin feeling regenerated for the day ahead.

WASH AWAY THE NIGHT WITH A SOAP BAR

All that dad dancing might’ve seemed like a good idea at the time, but it’ll leave you smelling sweatier than a truck driver come daybreak. To freshen up fast, The Bluebeards Revenge has a fine selection of vegan-friendly soap bars with three distinctive scents.

With their iconic ingot shapes, these chunky bars come primed and ready to lather you up in an instance. They’ll also make short work of that hand stamp from the lame club you ended up in…

STAY FRESH WITH DEODORANT

Don’t let that crisp cold shower fool you – hangover sweats can creep up on you at any time! And when they do, you’ll be praying your deodorant keeps pit stains at bay.

To fortify your defence, The Bluebeards Revenge Roll-On Eco-Warrior Deodorant is an all-natural formula that packs the brand’s original fresh and masculine scent. Better yet, its compact design means it can easily be slipped into a rucksack or messenger bag.

REDUCE PUFFINESS WITH A MOISTURISER

It’s likely your skin is dehydrated from the vodka shots you were downing at 3am, resulting in a dull and dry complexion. This is a big telltale sign that you didn’t have a quiet night in watching Netflix…

Fortunately, The Bluebeards Revenge Cooling Moisturiser is your saviour in a bottle. This rehydrating formula mixes jojoba and sweet almond oil with prickly pear and stinging nettle extract to create a cream that banishes blotches and masks horrifically puffy eyes!

MAKE MESSY BED HAIR PART OF YOUR STYLE

If you’ve snoozed your alarm and you’re running late, managing your mane is likely the last thing on your mind. Instead of stressing, learn to rock your rough and ready hair.

Pulling off bed hair is harder than you might think. It requires a certain confidence, as well as the right products. Luckily, The Bluebeards Revenge Matt Clay holds the answer to both.

With a medium hold that’ll keep your style locked in all day, this durable clay offers maximum versatility with a clean British barbershop scent. It’s a must for styling on the move.

TAME YOUR FACIAL FUZZ

If you missed your morning tidy-up due to one too many beers, it’s likely you’ve woken up with a face like a Wookiee. If you can’t bring yourself to hold a razor to your chops, a quick splash of The Bluebeards Revenge Classic Blend Beard Oil is the next best thing. This long-lasting fusion of essential oils will nourish the skin that’s masked beneath your facial hair while promoting a natural, healthy shine.

Something for the Weekend

Welcome to Something For The Weekend, i’m sure you’re all equally as glad as I am to see the back of that disgustingly long January.

In this week’s post I’ve chosen a couple of full-price pieces from the new season and a couple of sale items from last season which are somehow still hovering about!

Carharrt WIP Stetson Denim Jacket

Up first is this super understated denim jacket from one of our favourite brands. Carved out of 13.05oz denim, it’s as solid in its shape as it is durable.

Providing the optimum level of thickness, it can be layered with a thick hoodie or T-shirt, depending on what type of winter we get this year…

To discover the bit-size history of Carharrt and Carharrt WIP  check out ‘Something For The Weekend #6’.

 

Undercover x Clockwork Orange T-shirt

Due to the mild winter we’re experiencing so far it’s definitely a T-shirt under jacket kinda week. With an umbrella of course.

This T-shirt formed part of an unexpected but completely believable collection between Japanese street-lux brand Undercover and brit cult-classic film A Clockwork Orange. A film that even to this day is hard to top on the scale of disturbing. But an important film in the history of iconic screenplay’s nonetheless.

Undercover on the other hand doesn’t have such disturbing narratives. After being founded in 1993 by Bunka Fashion College graduate Jun Takahashi, the brand quickly translated into an international success becoming an early fixture in iconic Parisian store Collete. Following on from this Jun began to show at Paris Fashion Week in the early 2000’s with the support of fellow designer Rei Kawakubo.

Some of the more recent coveted bodies of work have come in the form of recent hype collaborations with Supreme x Public Enemy in 2018, on-going collab’s with Nike— and last seasons link-up with luxury heavy hitter Valentino for FW 19/20.

The link to the T-Shirt is in the image, I would 100% recommend having a browse at the last stage of Mr Porters SALE. Some of the discounts are insane!

Nike Air Force 1 Premium ‘Bark’

An instant yes from me as soon as I saw these on the sneaker forums earlier on this month. These AF1 premiums rarely get more premium than this. The blend of earthy leather’s and suede’s is what makes sneaker mouths like mine water.

It’s Incredible to think that the shoe which originally released in 1982 was discontinued only two years later. To be re-released two years after that.

The amount of iconic iterations since have surely put it near the number #1 spot, if not at the top for greatest sneaker of all time.

 

Stone Island Pistachio Ripstop pants

A bit of a curveball these pants, but the colour and material up close is trademark Stone Island. And it matches albeit rather contrastingly with the jacket and T.

Checkout the history of Stone-Island in our ‘Something For The Weekend #12”

Be sure to let us know what your favourite item is in the comments.

Until next time.